
Pain during sex: Physical intimacy should bring pleasure and connection, but for many people, pain disrupts these moments. Studies indicate that up to 30% of women and 5% of men experience pain during sexual activity at some point in their lives. If you’re among them, understanding the potential causes can help you find appropriate solutions.
Common causes of pain during sex
Insufficient Lubrication: Your body may not produce enough natural lubrication due to hormonal changes, medication side effects, or insufficient arousal time. This creates friction that irritates delicate tissues. Water-based lubricants offer an immediate solution, while addressing underlying causes provides long-term relief.
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Infections and Inflammation: Yeast infections, bacterial vaginosis, and urinary tract infections cause inflammation that makes intimate contact painful. Men may experience pain from prostatitis or epididymitis. Prompt medical treatment resolves these conditions and restores comfortable intimacy.
Skin Conditions: Eczema, psoriasis, and lichen sclerosus affect genital skin, making it sensitive and prone to tearing. Dermatological treatments, including medicated creams and appropriate hygiene practices help manage these conditions.
Pelvic Floor Dysfunction: Overly tight or weak pelvic floor muscles contribute to pain during penetration. These muscles may tighten in response to stress or past painful experiences. Pelvic floor physiotherapy dramatically improves symptoms for many patients through targeted exercises and relaxation techniques.
Emotional, psychological factors behind pain during sex
Anxiety and Stress: Your mind profoundly influences your body’s response during intimacy. Anxiety triggers muscle tension, especially in the pelvic region, making penetration difficult and painful. Stress also reduces natural lubrication. Mindfulness practices and open communication with partners help create a relaxed environment.

Past Trauma: Previous negative experiences, including sexual trauma, create protective responses in both mind and body. These reactions occur subconsciously, making intimate situations physically uncomfortable despite a conscious desire for connection. Trauma-informed therapy provides effective treatment.
How to get over the fear of sex?
Pain during intimacy isn’t something you should simply endure. Medical professionals who specialise in sexual health can provide accurate diagnoses and treatment options. Start with your primary care physician or gynaecologist, who may refer you to specialists.
When discussing your symptoms, describe the type, timing, and intensity of pain you experience. Note whether it occurs at specific times, with certain positions, or consistently with all intimate contact.
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Pain during intimacy creates a negative feedback loop. The anticipation of pain causes tension, which increases pain, leading to avoidance. Breaking this cycle requires addressing both physical and psychological aspects. With proper diagnosis and treatment, most people return to comfortable, enjoyable intimacy. Seeking help can lead to solutions and a renewed connection with your partner.